Monday, August 20, 2007

The Night Shift

Well, here it is, 8:27 AM and I'm still awake. If you haven't already heard (which I doubt you did) I started working the night shift at the dorms. All I really do is sit there and wait for an emergency to happen. I'm pretty much like a third base umpire waiting for that big play that will make or break the game. Maybe a call down to see if the batter swung or a loopy line drive down the line that may or may not grace the chalk. But, like most third base umpires, I was let down. No emergencies in the two nights I've worked. The only exciting thing out of the 14 combine hours of sitting was that about an hour before my shift this morning was over I found out I had internet. Kinda wish I knew that prior to just sitting there twiddling my thumbs.

Anyhoo, I just thought I'd post here since I haven't in about a week. I did start a post that I've been wanting to write for a while, but it's still not done. Got the draft done. But for now, this jolly ol' kid is going to go take his belly full of bacon-egg-n-begal and hit the sac.

Until next time,

Oh, by the way. I only made it to Wednesday for my no meat week. When you're going out into the city and not eating on your dime, you gotta make it count...and I did.

Saturday, August 11, 2007

The Challenge

So since I've been here, I've been working out about 3-4 times a week. Lifting, running, the usual. My pants fit somewhat better and I feel better. The one thing that is not happening is I can't see it, in the mirror or on the scale. I am still hovering around 195. My goal is to get down to my pre-college weight, a crisp 180. Now I do not want to do this where I loose the 15 pounds, say hoo-ray like most of those people on the weight loss shows and then gain it all back. I also want to gain muscle, hence why I'm lifting. So this weight loss thing is going to be a bit of a pain. But, I'm going to experiment.

I am not for vegetarians, at least the ones who go on and on about how killing innocent animals is cruel and all that mumbo jumbo. If a cheetah was not an endangered species, I'd eat the shit out of one of those things because you damn well know that he would do the same to me if I were in the wild with it. But they go on and on about how cows and chickens are so innocent. Well guess what veggies, so are the plants you are eating. When it comes down to it, both are living things, and when one person eats it, it dies. It's called the food chain, so get with it.

I love meat, but although I have a great distaste for vegetarians, I'm going to actually join them, for at least one week. I will keep my protein up with a bunch of peanut butter and other foods, but I am going to see how much weight I lose by keeping the same work out schedule. And, if I make it past one week and think I can go on, I'll try another week. The only time I will be eating meat is if I am out off campus at a party or something any other event where it would be rude of me not to eat what is served (as in the party I am going to tomorrow). I do still believe meat is good for you, but not the stuff they serve here at school. This is imitation and disgusting and I think it does not benefit me to eat everyday. I could go out and get my own meat, but I am poor (I am working 5 night shifts at the dorms just to make some extra money).

So we're going to keep track of this, one week at a time. I will keep an update anytime I find it hard to fight the urge/fall off my plan/find something funny in the gym, like me dealing with the football team who just arrived yesterday.

Until next time,

Friday, August 10, 2007

How To Get By In The Office Without Knowing Anyone's Name

I am just over a month into my new job and there are a lot of people that work in the office. Pretty much everyday I see a new football coach that wasn't there yesterday. I am a man of honesty, integrity, and red hair. What I am not a man of is a man with a good memory. It's not that I don't listen either. My girlfriend used to get angry at me but she realized too that after 10 minutes of entering my head, it's right back out, even if it is important. It may be ADD, it may be laziness. I really don't care (apparently it is due to apathy).

Now since I have to deal with coaches and other members of the athletic staff daily, it would seem it is important to remember these names. But in reality, all you need to know is a few names to get by. There are three important things to remember:

The Over Hi'ers: no matter what office you work in, there is the over peppy person. You know, the "Oh hi! How is your day so far even though it's 8 AM and it looks like you had a night of binge drinking and possibly prostitution but I'm still going to talk really loud as if there is a concert playing behind the wall." Unfortunetaly these are the people you need to remember their names for 1. they always say hi to you with your name, so you have to remember theirs and 2. to make fun of them later when you are slightly less hung over. Luckily, there are only a few of these, so write it down and make a note.

The Dudes: These are the easy and simple crowds. These are the people you use the standard dude move. When walking by you give the nod of the head slightly upwards and simply say "whats up" or "yo buddy" or "hey hows it going." Sometimes you'll find you are having these phrases ready before you even see anyone, but make sure you don't get caught off guard. Recently I feel into one of these situations:

(me walking down the hall passing a football coach)
Football Coach: Yo man, you see that game
Me: Hey hows it going

You look and feel silly for a few minutes after this happens, but he's most likely not going to care because he knows what situation you're in. He probably got a good 6 hours of sleep the night before and you still have 3 different stamps on your hand from the night before and your eyes are more blood shot than Bob Marley. Just shake it off and get ready for the next walk down the hall.

The Handshake: These, I have found, are the most awkward of situations. The more diverse your office is, the more handshakes you will find yourself having to remember. Sometimes you'll get the straight fist pound guy, sometimes you'll get a hi-five. Most of the time it's some sort of weird combo. And it's not an issue of white, black, Asian, or whatever race you are. It's really a regional thing. But when push comes to shove, you have to remember what kind of handshake you do with someone more than their name, because there is nothing more awkward than trying to go for fist pound when the other guy is going for the fist shake. Your hands will just mush together in an uncomfortable ball of awkwardness. You can always ask a name again, especially if you're new, but it's always uncomfortable when you have awkward physical connection, especially with another dude (if you're straight, that is).

Those are basically the three things you have to keep in mind when starting a new job. The work and the responsibility thing just falls in the place, so don't worry about that.

Well, Can't Hardly Wait is on and I'm out of money, so looks like I'll be on the couch for the rest of the night, which isn't too bad of a thing.

Until next time,

Thursday, August 9, 2007

The Great Miss: Dave Matthews Band and the Phillies

I knew moving up to NY was going to be a tough transition, but I didn’t know it was going to be this hard. No I am not talking about being lonely or depressed because I miss people from home. Truth of it is, if I were home, I’d still have that same lonely feeling since most of my friends have moved away anyway besides Ron. No, it’s because as I sat there last night, casually glancing at the Dave Matthews Band setlist for the concert I had tickets to while I would then glance over at the Phillies website to see them actually still winning even though some of their mainstay players are on the DL, it just made me feel like I was missing out on a great party in Philly, and wish I was there.

The Dave Matthews Band has been apart of my life since the fateful day of November 30, 1998. My dad got my brother a ticket to the show, but failed to tell my dad that he would still be in school and would not be able to make it to the show. So, with no one to take the ticket, my dad turned to me. I had never been to a concert and was already gearing up for my first, an Aerosmith show two weeks later. A free concert is a free concert, so I took the chance of getting to know new music…and then it started. I only knew a handful of DMB songs at this point, probably Don’t Drink the Water and Crash Into Me being the only ones I could tell off hand. But happened this night was a transformation that brings anger into the eyes of my dad towards my brother every time he hears I am going to another DMB show. Since that night, I have been to over 25 shows. As I got older, I started to go to less and less, not because of my age, but because the band has been putting out less quality music as I longed for the older songs they weren’t playing. But going to one or two shows a year was still greatly enjoyable. Turn the page to this year, where I get tickets to my standard Camden Night 2 show and I get this job. So I have to accept the fact that this may be the first year since 1998 that I do not attend a DMB show (though I’m holding out that they play Madison Square Garden this winter). I was contempt. I have had my fair share of shows. So Ron, take Lauren, go to the show, have a good time…then I see the set.

They not only mixed up rarer live songs, but the changed up the spots to make the show more unpredictable. One reason I started enjoying going to Camden each year is because it was pretty much the same thing, Two Step closer, Crash would be there somewhere, and then a bunch of crappier songs. This time they did break out newer songs, but the difference is, these newer songs are quality. Mix that in with the older songs and a Two Step opener to get those chanters to shut up early, it seemed like an amazing show, and from people I already talked to, it was.

After griping about not being at the show and eating a peanut butter and banana sandwich (those things are mega ultra big time good) I checked the Phillies website. I saw the Mets had already lost (all I get is Yankees or Mets games up here and is starting to get to me) but it didn’t really matter since they were playing the Braves who are right behind us in the race. After Chase Utley and Shane Victorino went down, I pretty much lost hope, though, as a true Philly fan, I kept some and I kept it strong. I mean come on, though we have Howard and Hammels, who else are we going to rely on? Wes Helms? Bat Burrell? 75 year old Jamie Moyer? It pretty much seemed out. But look at those Phils. They have won 3 straight and the bats are staying strong. Of course the bullpen is still a let down (it has been said that Jose Mesa may actually be over 50 years old), but we have Brett Myers in the to start smacking around those who screw it up for the rest of us.

My conclusion: this year we may actually have a shot…for the playoffs. Are we going to win the World Series, most likely not. Myers can’t smack around the bullpen that much. He has to save enough for when he gets home to his wife. But we may actually see progress this year, which would be amazing. Falling one game short of the playoffs for third or fourth year may bring some Philadelphia fans to kill…Pat Burrell. Well, that wouldn’t be too horrible of a plan. I mean, come on:

My favorite offer is 17 chickens, 8 sheep, a box of wine, a gold hat. I'd take that any day.

Until next time


P.S. I am still working on the Ways to Survive In NY For $500 A Month and I’m also working on How To Get By In Your Office Without Knowing Anyone’s Name. Hopefully I’ll have one of those up sometime this week.